


As If No One Knows

by SingingInTheRaiin



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Elias is a dick, Gen, I'm Sorry, M/M, Martin and Jon and madly in love, Tim and Sasha do both still die, a happier ending for episode 160, covers the first four seasons, even he doesn't know everything though, just certain moments, not a complete rewrite, some gore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-04
Packaged: 2021-02-25 21:42:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21672418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SingingInTheRaiin/pseuds/SingingInTheRaiin
Summary: Jon and Martin have been dating since long before Jon's promotion to Head Archivist. That in itself may not be enough to change everything, but it does leave room for small changes all throughout.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims
Comments: 8
Kudos: 166





	As If No One Knows

Martin let out a soft laugh as he walked into Jon’s office once he heard the end of the recording. “Did you basically just call me useless?”

Jon’s head snapped up to look towards the doorway, making it clear that he had been completely oblivious to the fact that Martin had been standing there for the past several minutes. “No! I mean, yes, but it was only for- it was just to- I didn’t mean…” he trailed off and gave Martin a helpless look.

Martin rolled his eyes and decided to take pity on his boyfriend, so he closed the office door behind him and then made his way over to the desk so that he could gently pull Jon up into a hug. “It’s fine. I mean, I did already agree to this, sort of. I mean, I know that you said that you wanted to keep our relationship a secret, I just didn’t know it meant insulting me on tape. Imagine what someone’s going to think if they ever pull out one of your tapes for their research and they just hear you talking about your useless assistant Martin.”

Even though his tone was light and teasing, Jon still sounded guilty as he apologized. “I’m sorry, I didn’t really think it through. I guess I just figured that it would be easiest to hide our- our relationship if everyone thinks that I don’t like you.”

They kept hugging for much longer than Jon would tolerate from anybody else, and then they pulled apart reluctantly. “It’s going to be a lot different than before, isn’t it? I mean when we were both just working in research.”

“Yes, well, one thing is the same, at least. Only one of us is actually qualified for our job.”

Martin rolled his eyes, even as he knew that Jon was probably never going to stop teasing him for lying on his resume. But he would also never dare let it slip to anyone else; that was something Martin trusted in 100%. He kissed the top of Jon’s head, which was at the perfect height for such a gesture, and then he left to go and do his job, and let Jon do his own work as well. 

As he walked over to the desks, he looked at the other assistant researchers. All three of them had their desks grouped together in the largish space outside of Jon’s office (and there was a fourth desk that was not yet occupied), so it was easy to chat with and get to know them. Tim and Sasha were both cheerful and pleasant to be around, and they had both already picked up on Jon’s supposed dislike of him, and therefore tried even harder to be friendly. Martin felt bad about lying, but he did understand Jon’s reasoning. 

When they’d both been on the same level, making the same pay and working under the same boss, there had been no issue. It was where they’d met, afterall (and everyone on the research floor had had to suffer through months of Martin and Jon awkwardly dancing around each other). But now with Jon’s promotion, he was technically Martin’s boss. And it was no coincidence that Martin had been brought down to the basement within days of his boyfriend. Jon insisted that Martin was the best man for the job, despite his lack of qualifications, but he didn’t want anyone else to doubt Martin’s place just because of his connection to Jon. 

It’s not as though the two of them had ever been big on PDA, but it was frustrating to no longer be able to share all those casual little moments that they used to. Brushing hands when they passed each other in the hallway, bringing each other tea, meeting up in the lounge just to look at each other for a moment.

But it was fine. This was what Jon wanted, and he only wanted it to protect Martin, so Martin would just have to learn to live with it. He sighed as he sank down into his seat, and then finally tuned into the conversation that was going on next to him. “-can’t believe it. I mean, I know we’ve only known the guy for all of a week, but he just seems so… cold. I mean, look at how he’s been treating Martin!”

Martin’s head jerked up at the mention of his name, and he realized what Tim and Sasha had to be talking about. He started to shake his head and deny all of that, because if they just took a moment to get to know Jon they would realize how deeply he cares, and he only hides it because he hates being seen as vulnerable, and he- but then Martin remembered the ruse, and he sighed. 

“He’s not so bad,” he offered quietly. 

Tim swiveled around in his chair to give Martin a look of disbelief. “Come on, he’s a total prick to you! I mean, he’s not exactly Mr. Nice Guy with us, but at least he treats us with the basic decency expected of a fellow human being.”

Sasha tilted her head thoughtfully instead of immediately agreeing with Tim. “Didn’t you two used to work together? In research? I mean, I know it’s like a maze up there with a million different divisions, but I thought I saw you two together a couple of times.”

Martin nodded. “Yeah. We were in the same division.” He didn’t want to outright lie to his new coworkers, though, so he left it at that. Did a lie of omission still count as a lie? It was something he’d be sure to have a lively debate about with Jon. 

Tim crossed his arms over his chest. “Has he always acted that way towards you? I mean, if he really thinks you’re incompetant- which of course you’re not! then why did he let you get transferred to the archives?”

Before Martin had to think of anything clever to say, Jon’s voice called out from his office. “I’m hearing a lot of chatter and not a lot of research! You’re not getting paid to stand around and gab!”

Tim rolled his eyes. “He’s such a cheery guy, isn’t he.” Then the three assistants all returned to their individual assignments, and Martin found that he couldn’t wait until it was time to go home, because at least there he wouldn’t have to pretend like he wasn’t madly in love with Jon. He wouldn’t have to pretend that Jon wasn’t amazing.  
,,,

Martin knew a lot of things about Jon that probably nobody else in the world knew about. Like how Jon had been such a lonely kid, raised by a grandmother who didn’t seem to put much effort into caring about him (though Jon always adamantly insisted otherwise). Or how Jon had a strong disliking of spiders ever since an incident from his childhood (though even Martin didn’t know the full story of that, he just knew that it was rather adorable how Jon would hide behind him until Martin had removed the offending spider from wherever). Or how Jon actually did truly believe in the supernatural, but found it easier to pretend otherwise even after being promoted to Head Archivist of the Magnus Institute, of all places.

Martin also knew that if he told Jon about his discoveries, Jon would believe him in an instant, but because of the show they put on for everyone else, he would have to pretend like he didn’t. So that’s why Martin was determined to get evidence. He needed to save Jon from being put in the awkward position of pretending that he didn’t believe Martin at all.

Instead of finding any proof, though, Martin found himself without his phone, trapped inside the flat. It had been stupid to run here of all places, but it’s where Martin’s instincts had already declared to be a safe place. And he had no way to contact Jon and warn him of the monster laying siege to their home, because the wi-fi flickered out before he could send so much as an email. Martin was trapped, and Jon was going to come home to a trap, and it was all Martin’s fault for not just leaving well enough alone. 

Even as he plugged every hole in the place he could find, in order to keep out those disgusting silver worms, Martin desperately hoped that this would be one of those nights that Jon pulled an all-nighter. Normally Martin did everything in his power to make sure Jon came home at a reasonable hour, but right now he needed Jon to stay far away from here, and the Institute was probably as safe a place as any.

In his panic and utter terror, Martin almost missed the sound of a ringtone coming from somewhere in the flat. And even though he didn’t want to take his eyes off the front door for longer than he had to, he began to search. And it didn’t take long before he spotted Jon’s cellphone on the floor next to the bed, ringing as Tim’s name flashed across the screen.

Martin snatched up the phone and quickly answered the call. He didn’t know Jon’s password, so if he lost this chance all he’d be able to do is call 999, and he wasn’t sure they’d be able to help much against someone like Jane Prentiss. “Hello?”

Instead of Tim, it was Jon’s confused voice that came through. “M- Martin? Do you have my phone? I thought I lost it, so Tim suggested calling it to hear it ring. Where are you? Can you bring it to me?”

Martin choked back a relieved sigh at the sound of Jon’s voice. Somehow it made him feel as though everything was going to be better, even though he had no other proof that it would be. He clutched the phone like it was his lifeline, so tightly that he was almost afraid of breaking it. “I’m at home, but you can’t come. I was trying to look into Vittery, but I think- I think I found Jane Prentiss, or what used to be Jane Prentiss- or- or-”

“Martin,” Jon interrupted in a firm voice. The kind of voice that said he knew exactly what to do (even though past experience told Martin that Jon rarely ever knew exactly what he needed to do). “Explain to me exactly what is going on. I am going to get you out of there, I swear.” And that- that was one of the reasons that Martin loved Jon. Jon rarely made promises, but when he did, he meant them with every fiber of his being, and Martin knew that somehow, by some miracle, Jon would figure out how to get them out of this mess.  
,,,

In the end, Martin found himself staring at a door on the wall that had not been there before. After all the things that he had read about and heard about while working in the archives, Martin was pretty sure that he knew better than to just walk through an unfamiliar door in his own home.

But then the door popped open, and Jon peered out. He certainly looked uneasy, and maybe slightly seasick, somehow, but then he stretched his hand out, and Martin ran forward to take it. He let himself get led down a long hallway that had peeling wallpaper and a suspiciously stained carpet, and then they stepped through another door, and they were standing in the archives, and even though he believed in the supernatural, if he hadn’t just been chased by Jane Prentiss and her worms, he might think that he had somehow dreamed up that bizarre method of travel. 

Martin gave Jon a long look as the door behind them disappeared like it had never been there. “What- what just happened?”

Jon curled his hands into fists, and hunched over, making himself look even smaller than he already did. “He- it- it said that it wants to help us. Or something like that.” He frowned, and then looked down at the floor instead of meeting Martin’s eyes. “I know that I shouldn’t just trust in some strange creature that- but- I just- I couldn’t just leave you there.”

Then without another word, both of them surged forward to pull each other into a tight hug, each taking comfort in the other’s presence. Martin shuddered to think of what could have happened if Jon hadn’t left his phone at home and had returned to the flat at the end of the day to find- well. 

Martin pulled the phone out of his pocket to hand it over. “I’ve never been more relieved that you don’t bother keeping better track of your phone.” There was a puzzled frown on Jon’s face as he accepted the device, though, and he stared down at it like it was some great mystery. Martin looked at the phone again, but didn’t see anything particularly strange about it. “What?”

There was a moment of silence as Jon continued to stare at the phone before he finally looked up. “Martin I- I know I can be forgetful about certain things, but I know for sure that I had my phone with me this morning. Here, in the Institute. I remember because-” his face tinted slightly pink. “-I was listening to some music while I worked, and Sasha came in to make fun of my music taste. I turned it off then, and I didn’t think about it until hours later, and when I couldn’t find it, that’s when Tim suggested I try calling it. How did it- How could it have gotten home?” Then Jon let out a tired sigh, and he slipped the phone into his own pocket. He reached up to run a hand across his face, and then leaned forward to press his face against Martin’s shoulder. Martin was more than happy to wrap his arms around Jon again. Even if it had only been for a few hours, he couldn’t help feeling like it was probably one of the worst things he’d ever experienced.

“What are we going to do now? What if she’s still there?”

“I have a- I have a cot down here. In the file room. Or that awful excuse for a file room, anyways. Put it in for late nights, so I wouldn’t disturb you by getting back late.”

There would be plenty of time to feel somewhat bothered by that later. For now, though, Martin was just grateful that they had a place to stay. At least for a little while, until they could be sure that they would be safe at home.

It wasn’t until later that night, after they’d both stripped down and curled up together under the blanket, squeezed tightly because it was a small cot, that Jon cleared his throat. “Martin, your phone… what happened to it?”

Martin blinked sleepily. “Hm? I dropped it. Didn’t have time to pick it up before making a run for it. Why?”

There was a pause, and then Jon rolled over so that he was facing Martin, and he held out his phone. Martin shied away from the bright screen until his eyes adjusted, and then he looked at the words on the screen. There was an alert of a new text, under the cow and two heart emojis that Jon used instead of Martin’s name in his contacts. The text read ‘Keep him. We have had our fun. He will want to see it when the Archivist’s crimson fate arrives’. A shiver ran down Martin’s spine, and he pulled Jon closer to him so that they were pressed together as much as possible. He wanted Jon to offer him some words of comfort, but he knew that Jon preferred to never lie to him, so when there was only silence, it felt somehow worse. And he couldn’t stop thinking about ‘the Archivist’s crimson fate’, because he couldn’t think of any way to interpret that other than a direct threat towards Jon. What the hell were they going to do?  
,,,

Living in the archives wasn’t exactly Martin’s idea of a good time, but he found that it was made infinitely better just by having Jon there too. It meant that when Jon worked too late, working himself to the bone to figure out what was going on, Martin could just pick him up and carry him to the cot to get some rest. And that they could lie in bed together a little later in the mornings than usual, since they didn’t need time to commute to work. Though Jon always kept his distance as soon as the others showed up, still insistent on maintaining that stupid ruse even though there were clearly more important matters to deal with. 

It was nice, but Martin did miss being at home, and having all of his own clothes and things. And he missed a time when he didn’t start to worry whenever he went more than a couple of hours without seeing Jon. He knew that the Institute was safe, but he just couldn’t stop himself from being afraid. 

Maybe it helped a little bit, when Sasha met that door monster, and he showed her that the fire extinguishers killed the worms, but no matter how many canisters he stashed around the archives, he still felt like they were vastly underprepared. But Jon insisted that the Institute was safe, and Elias had even come down to the basement to call an archive-only staff meeting where he assured them all that their safety was his top priority. So what else could Martin do?  
,,,

The Institute was not safe. Jon was injured, and Sasha had gone off on her own, and Martin couldn’t recall a time where he’d ever felt more terrified. He glanced back to make sure that Jon was keeping up with his injured leg, and then froze. Jon and Tim were nowhere in sight, and there were worms everywhere so all he could do was keep moving forward. 

Pictures of Jon’s corpse flashed through Martin’s mind, and it took everything in him not to just drop to his knees and vomit. How was he supposed to deal with this? 

And then he found his way into the tunnels, and Martin had never been scared of the dark or the closed spaces or getting lost, but he could hardly think when he thought he could hear the squirming of the worms behind him, and he felt sick with worry over Jon. And Tim and Sasha of course, but Jon was already hurt, and he had a tendency to make rash decisions when he felt backed into a corner, and Martin didn’t know how he was able to keep moving forward.

He ducked into a room, and his eyes widened at the sight of what was clearly a corpse in front of him. And despite the… decay, he recognized the body of Gertrude Robinson, Jon’s predecessor. He’d only seen her a few times in passing, but she was a memorable lady. He certainly didn’t remember the three bullet holes in her, though. He couldn’t help it, he screamed.  
,,,

After Jon had insisted on getting statements from everyone, Martin had to practically drag his boyfriend home. It didn’t seem as though Jon cared if anyone knew about their relationship or not, and Martin was certainly far too tired to worry about any of it. 

He kept looking at Jon, at the bandages all over his arm and face, and he knew that there were more under his shirt. Jon scowled when he realized Martin was looking, and quickly turned away. Any other time Martin would try to figure out the problem, but at the moment he was exhausted and just so relieved to be able to walk away, with Jon. Even if it hurt to see how hurt Jon had gotten, and he felt guilty for getting separated from Jon and Tim. 

When they got home, Martin was ready to finally just curl up in his bed for the first time in months, and to hold Jon tightly to assure himself that he was alive and safe. But Jon paused in the doorway to the bedroom, eyes looking around shiftily. “I think I uh- I need to- I’ve got some things. To do.” 

Martin sighed. “What things? The only thing you need to do right now is get some rest. Jon-” He reached out to touch Jon’s arm, but Jon jerked back, and Martin couldn’t hide how much that hurt. “Alright. I’ll be here. Try not to stay up too late.” But curling up under the blankets alone didn’t feel nearly as comforting as it would have with Jon.  
,,,

After Jon literally passes out from exhaustion, Martin declares that enough is enough. He scooped Jon up and brought him to the file room to set him up on the cot, and then found a chair to drag in so that he could sit in the doorway. He resolved not to let Jon leave until they’d talked, really talked, about whatever was going on with Jon. 

Martin ended up drifting off in the middle of a poem he was working on, but he was woken up by the feeling of a blanket getting draped over him. He slowly opened his eyes and saw Jon standing there, looking resigned to the fact he’d been caught. “Hey,” he started softly. 

Martin stood up, taking the blanket with him. Then he sat down on the edge of the cot and held up one end of the blanket so that Jon would have room to cuddle in next to him. But Jon just remained standing where he was, rubbing at his arms and awkwardly shifting on his feet. “Why have you been avoiding me, Jon?”

Jon let out a long sigh, and then looked down at the floor. “It’s complicated.”

“I believe that, but can you at least try? Please?”

Jon sighed again, and he just sounded so tired, and Martin just wanted to wrap him up in a hug and protect him from everything, but Jon wasn’t letting him. “Martin, I’ve never really thought of myself as a vain man, honestly, but even you can’t ignore all of- of this!” He gestured to his face. 

And Martin could believe that Jon was having trouble accepting that he was permanently scarred in such a visible area, but he was also pretty sure that that wasn’t the thing keeping Jon up all night, and making him look more and more drained every day. But still, at least it was something he could try and tackle. “Jon, I don’t know whether you believe me or not, but I honestly don’t care what you look like. I mean, to me, you’re always going to be the most beautiful, wonderful, handsome guy I’ve ever met. But even if everyone else in the world thought you looked like an ugly little cave troll, I’d still love you with all I’ve got. You have to know that I don’t care about a few scars. They’re just- they’re just proof that you’re so strong, and that you could survive something so terrible. I wish you didn’t have to go through what you did, but I’m so grateful that you made it out the other end, no matter what you look like.”

There was a brief pause, and then Jon hurried to sit down on the edge of the cot next to Martin, letting the blanket fall down over one arm as he pressed up against Martin with the other. “Martin, someone killed Gertrude Robinson and hid her body down in the tunnels. How can I believe that it wasn’t someone in the Institute who did it?”

Ah. Suddenly it made sense why Jon had been acting so squirrely, and had also mentioned something about strange it was that Tim was ‘into’ the supernatural enough. “Jon… even if you’re right, surely you don’t suspect me?”

There was not a single moment of hesitation before Jon shook his head. “Of course not. But that still leaves Tim and Elias as fairly suspicious, and there are any number of other employees here who could have interacted with Gertrude and had the means and motive to kill her. But I can’t clear you and not the others if they think it’s because of our relationship.”

Martin couldn’t help letting out a groan that felt like it had been building up over the entire past year. “Jon, honestly, I think that trying to stay that separate at work has only made things worse. We’ve both been through something awful, and we need to be able to support each other. And besides…” 

“What?”

It hadn’t seemed like a big deal, and Martin hadn’t wanted to ruin all of Jon’s grand plans, but he just couldn’t take another day of acting like practical strangers whenever they were around the others. “Everyone in our research division knows we’re together, and it’s not like they never talk to the basement dwellers. Tim and Sasha have both known for months.” 

Jon blinked a few times in sheer disbelief, and then he just ducked his head down. “Oh.” There was a long pause, and he nudged his head into the side of Martin’s arm. “Have I just been an insufferable prick since I got promoted?”

Martin laughed. “No, of course not! Well, not entirely anyways. But it’s fine. I know that you’ve been under a lot of stress since getting your new job. But you can’t just shut me out, Jon. Please.”

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I love you.”

It was always so difficult for Jon to say the words, which made Martin cherish them all the more for it every time they were said. He pulled Jon closer, and didn’t bother trying to hide his smile. There was clearly still a lot to sort out- especially if Gertrude’s murderer was just walking around the Institute- but as long as he and Jon were on the same page, they’d be able to figure it out.  
,,,

Martin couldn’t help feeling somewhat bashful as he reached out to hold Jon’s hand. It had been a while since he’d been able to do that whenever he wanted to. Since Tim and Sasha already knew, there was no need for any sort of big announcement. He was just happy to have a hand to hold.  
,,,

It was quite rare that Jon ever acted responsibly enough to go home at a reasonable time, which is why Martin was quite confused when he knocked on the Head Archivist’s office door, only for Tim to call out that Jon had headed home early looking kind of sick. 

Martin checked his phone, but he definitely hadn’t gotten any texts or calls. And even though he tried to insist to himself over and over that everything was okay, and Jane Prentiss was dead (as the jar of ashes on Jon’s desk attested to). But he got a bad feeling no matter how much he logically tried to convince himself that it was fine, and he hurried home.

When he burst in through the front door, he felt as though he needed to deflate somewhat, because Jon was sitting at the dining table, several folders and papers spread out in front of him. Martin frowned. “You’re home… early.” 

Jon glanced up, and there was a pensive look on his face. “Martin, how do you know that Sasha and Tim are aware of our relationship?”

Whatever Martin had been expecting, it hadn’t been that. “Uh, it’s just like I said, lots of office gossip. And Sasha may or may not have tried to helpfully tell me to give up my crush on you because it was ‘hopeless’ And I felt bad about deceiving her, and figured that after everything we’ve all been through, I could trust her, so I let her in on the truth.” Jon didn’t laugh, he just stared intently at the tape recorder that was sitting on the table. “Why? What’s going on?”

Instead of answering, Jon reached out to press play on the recorder, and it was Sasha’s voice that spoke. _“You and Martin seemed rather cozy out there today. Just- just don’t hurt him, okay? He really likes you.”_

_“...what?”_

_“I’m just trying to look out for him. Of course I like you, Jon, but I don’t think you’re the one who needs anyone taking care of them.”_

_“Martin and I have been together for almost five years now.”_

_“Oh. Well in that case, I’m happy for you both. Really, I am.”_ Then there was a click as Jon stopped the playback. 

“This is from today,” Jon said in a low voice. “Sasha didn’t know that we’re together.” He gave Martin a long look, but Martin had absolutely no idea what to say, and he could tell that Jon wasn’t finished yet. “One of the first statements that refused to be digitally recorded was from someone who’s neighbor was replaced by someone entirely different, only no one ever seemed to notice it. And I hadn’t thought about it before, but those tapes that went missing after you found Gertrude? They were all the tapes that had Sasha speaking on them. I’m not sure exactly what it means, but it can’t be a coincidence.”

Martin stared at his boyfriend, unrealistically hoping that it would turn out to be some kind of joke. But Jon’s face showed how far from joking he was, and Martin’s eyes widened slightly. “What are you saying, Jon? That- that Sasha isn’t…”

Jon shrugged. “I don’t know. I just don’t know.”  
,,,

When Jon called Martin and Tim to his office and said that he wasn’t feeling well so they needed to go home, Martin immediately knew that Jon was planning on doing something stupid. Not that it wasn’t easy to believe that Jon was unwell, considering how little sleep he’d been getting lately, but he didn’t show any of his other usual signs of illness, and he refused to look Martin in the eyes. 

So as much as Martin hated to argue with Jon, he crossed his arms over his chest and refused to leave until Jon told him what was actually going on. Tim looked back and forth between Jon and Martin, and then stayed where he was as well. Maybe if Martin hadn’t been around to stop Jon from all but stalking his coworkers things would be different, but as it was, even the extreme paranoia Jon had been feeling ever since Prentiss’ attack hadn’t been enough to stop Jon and Tim from somewhat bonding over their shared trauma. 

Jon gave in quickly (which only seemed to further prove just how tired he really was), and then he pulled out an axe. That was definitely not what Martin had expected. “I was going to destroy the table. The one in artifact storage. Here, listen to this.” Then he played a tape of a woman speaking to Jon, and then she was screaming, and then Sasha’s voice came in sounding very creepy. Jon sighed as he pressed stop. “According to Gertrude, the voice on old tape recorders won’t be changed the way it is everywhere else. Whoever’s been here for the past year is not Sasha. And it would explain why she was having so many computer issues. Whatever it is, it’s one of the things that refuses to be digitally recorded, and for some reason doesn’t like any digital technology. So I was going to destroy the table. It was surprisingly easy to get an axe in here.”

Tim’s face had drooped more and more as Jon spoke, and then he crossed his arms over his chest, a hard look taking over. “How do you know that destroying the table will kill it?”

Jon looked surprised by the question. “What?” 

“Maybe the table is involved somehow, maybe not, but what makes you think that it’s some kind of lifeline to- to whatever it is?”

Before Jon could speak, there was a sudden voice in the room that made the three men all jump. “He’s right, you know. It hardly pays to jump in without all the facts.” 

Michael grinned at them from his doorway, and Martin immediately moved to put himself between Jon and Michael. Even if Michael had been the one responsible for saving him from Jane Prentiss at his flat, and then gave them the information needed to stop her for good, he was also the one who had stabbed Jon, and that was unforgivable. 

It was hard to keep track of all the specific events that happened after that, but Martin knew that he and Tim had ended up wandering a familiar, seemingly endless, hallway for quite a while. When they finally emerged, it was to Sa- to not Sasha telling them that Jon was wanted for murder. 

Daisy was the only one after Jon, so it was surprisingly easy to keep up communication with his boyfriend, and even though the idea of Jon living with his ex was strange, Martin knew better than to be jealous. 

Things weren’t great at the Institute, with both Martin and Tim constantly on edge around not Sasha, and Elias just went around acting like it was all some kind of grand joke. 

When Jon mentioned his latest injuries, it had taken everything in Martin to not just storm over to Georgie’s and grab Jon to drag him away from all of this. Instead, he just clutched his phone tighter. “Are you- are you alright?” It was a stupid question that he immediately regretted asking.

Jon let out a sigh that sounded like a rush of wind over the phone. “I’ve been better, but I’ll be fine.” It didn’t sound like a lie, exactly, but it also didn’t sound like Jon really believed it. “I miss you,” he added so quietly that Martin almost thought he’d imagined it. 

Martin gulped. “I miss you too. I love you, Jon. Please at least try to stay safe.” Though maybe that wasn’t a fair thing to ask, since he knew that Jon was going to keep investigating, no matter how many dangerous people it meant interacting with. Jon said he’d try, but didn’t actually make any promises. And when Martin finally hung up, he couldn’t help feeling slightly startled to see Elias just standing nearby, staring at him intently. “Can I help you with something?”

“Who were you just talking to?”

Martin frowned. “I thought you knew everything, so why even ask?”

Despite the situation, Martin found that he could almost enjoy the slight look of surprise on Elias’ face. He was pretty sure that it was something he’d never seen before. Elias just blinked once, and then turned and walked away, leaving Martin to wonder what exactly the man was up to.  
,,,

Jon returned to work once everyone was made aware that Elias was the murderer, and that none of them had any choice but to stay. Jon seemed constantly on edge, and Martin told him that he could read statements from home if it made him more comfortable, but Jon had just responded by saying he wasn’t going to leave Martin in the Institute on his own, and then immediately ducked his head down to hide his blush.

So when Martin went to Jon’s office to bring him some tea, he was surprised to see the room empty. And Jon’s phone was lying face down on the floor. Martin picked it up and saw the screen was cracked. Of course Martin had no fondness for Elias, but he rushed to Elias’ office anyways, and slammed his hands down on the man’s desk. “Where’s Jon? I know you must know where he is!”

Elias sighed, and had the audacity to look irritated. “Honestly, if I’d known that Jon had such a large attachment… Well, it’s of no matter now. Even I have my limits, Martin, and whoever took him is very good at hiding.”

The confirmation that Jon had indeed been taken shook everything in Martin. He suspected that Elias knew more than he let on, but without even the vaguest hint of a location or identity of the kidnapper, Martin could do nothing but sit around uselessly. He told the others that Jon had been kidnapped, and they all tried different ways of getting Elias to talk (well, Melanie tried straight up murder, but it was the thought that counted). 

Then not Sasha got a strange gleam in her eyes, and told everyone she’d be taking off for a sick day. She came back two days later with Jon in tow. Jon told Martin that he’d made a deal with her, and Martin hadn’t pushed for the details. He just knew that a week later, not Sasha didn’t show up for work, and they never saw her again. And he had no idea what had happened, because he hadn’t let Jon out of his sight for more than a few minutes in that time.  
,,,

It had been Martin’s idea to stay behind in the Institute, but he’d never have suggested it if he’d known that the day would end with him sitting in the hospital next to Jon’s unnaturally still body. He was afraid that Jon would never wake up again. But even so, he couldn’t accept the position of Peter Lukas’ assistant, because he could never let go of Jon.

When Georgie called to tell him that Jon had woken up, Martin broke several speeding laws to get to the hospital as quickly as possible, and raced to Jon’s room. As soon as he laid eyes on that reckless, stupid, wonderful man, he broke and cried out all the tears that had been building up for the past six months.

He pulled Jon into a hug, and it was immediately returned, and Martin didn’t question how someone who’d been comatose for half a year could move so easily. “Don’t you dare ever do that to me again!”

“I’m sorry,” Jon murmured over and over, until eventually Martin’s tears dried up. Jon scooted over so that Martin could sit next to him on the bed, and Martin noticed that the ladies had left, and had probably been gone for some time now. “You’re always reminding me to set my alarm, but I guess I forgot.”

Martin snorted as he reached up to rub at his eyes. “Well, it was just a bit of a nap, so I suppose I can forgive you just this once.”

They both let out watery laughs, and then stayed cuddled up to each other all night, unable to let go.  
,,,

Martin frowned. “I’m sorry- you what?”

Jon waved around the knife in his hand. “I need to cut off my finger so that I can use it as an anchor to get back here once I find Daisy.”

Martin shook his head. “Jon, you can’t just go down into the Buried!” He wanted to forbid it, or threaten to break up, but in the end he knew that Jon was going to do what he thought was right, especially when he had so much guilt inside of him (even though none of it was really his fault). That stubbornness, and that insistence that he wasn’t a brave man even though he clearly was, those were things that Martin loved about Jon. So he just sighed, and leaned back against the wall. “It won’t work. I’ve read the same statements you have. How emotionally attached are you to your pinky?”

Jon looked utterly shocked. “Oh. Oh!”

“You idiot,” Martin told him in the fondest voice possible. 

Then Jon walked over to lean up and give Martin a kiss. “I guess I already have an anchor, then. Something to call me back here. Because there’s no way I could ever leave you behind.”

Martin felt his heart race at the love confession, and couldn’t resist leaning down for another kiss. “I’ll be here the whole time you’re gone,” he promised. “Just- just make it back safely.”

The next three days felt like the longest of his life, but then Jon was back, and he’d succeeded in getting Daisy, and it felt like maybe things were finally starting to look up.  
,,,

It didn’t escape Martin’s notice that Jon was different now, but then again, hadn’t all of them changed since they’d first naively gone down to the archives? If Jon had to feed on a few statements to live, then it was hardly the end of the world. And when Jon was really craving a live statement, well Martin already had nightmares, and he certainly had plenty of traumatic encounters with the fears, so it was easy enough for him to summon up a statement of his own to give to Jon every now and then. It was such a small price to pay to have Jon by his side, alive and well.  
,,,

Most of them preferred to stay in the Institute, where they felt as though they had at least a little bit of protection from all of the avatars out there that seemed intent on causing them harm. But Georgie couldn’t drive Melanie to therapy one day, and Jon volunteered to do it. 

When he came back, he had the look of someone who’d been through yet another painful situation, and Martin wanted to scream at the universe for constantly taking everything out on Jon when he didn’t deserve that. He said that Jared Hopworth had approached him to offer a deal- a bone for a statement. And Jon admitted that maybe his cravings weren’t as well handled as he’d led Martin to believe, because he’d immediately accepted. He was now short a rib, but looked healthier than he had in months, so Martin wasn’t sure how mad he should actually be about it.  
,,,

He had no idea what had happened. He couldn’t remember the last few minutes, all he knew was that between one blink and the next, he found himself standing in the middle of a cold white fog. It took up everything, and seemed to invade Martin’s senses, and yet there was something oddly comforting about it. In this place, he didn’t need to worry about anything. There was no pain or worry or danger, there was only nothing, and it was nice.

He wandered around, and he knew instinctively that he would never encounter anyone else. And that was fine. He was content to just wander. 

He had no idea how long it had been, but suddenly, in the distance, he could hear someone shouting. The noise, as faint as it was, felt quite jarring after the silence that had surrounded him. The voice got closer, and louder. “Martin! Martin, where are you?” It was a voice full of desperation, and fear, and then- oh, right, _he_ was Martin! And that was Jon calling out for him!

Martin tried to hurry towards the voice, but he couldn’t hear it for a while, and he had no idea where he was going, and then suddenly Jon was right in front of him. He was covered in blood, but Martin wasn’t sure if the concern he felt was real, or just a reflex. He spent so much time worrying about Jon, and he remembered how exhausting it could feel. 

Jon reached out to grab Martin’s hand, but it passed right through. “Martin, listen to me, I’m here to take you home.”

Martin blinked a few times, slowly. “Why? Everyone’s better off if I stay here.”

Jon narrowed his eyes, and had that look on his face that he always wore when he was trying to hide pain. Martin felt a pang of guilt, and it felt more real than anything else at the moment. “Don’t you dare say that, Martin. We- I need you. I- I thought I came here because you were lost, but the truth is that I came because I was. I’m utterly lost without you, Martin. I love you so much.”

The word ‘love’ resonated somewhere in Martin’s chest, and then he could feel Jon’s hand holding his. “I don’t- I can’t-”

“Look at me, Martin,” Jon commanded. “What do you see?”

It was the first promise that Jon had ever broken, because after figuring out about his compulsion power, he had promised to never intentionally use it on Martin. But that promise didn’t stop the words from tumbling out of Martin’s mouth. “I see you.” Then his eyes widened, as he really looked. Jon wasn’t just another person standing there, he was the love of his life, and he’d be crazy to stay here without Jon. Who would he take care of, then, and get taken care of in turn? “I see you, Jon.”

The look of relief on Jon’s face was staggering, and then Martin was being tugged down into a very passionate kiss before Jon pulled away, still tightly holding Martin’s hand. “Come on, then. Let’s go home.”

Martin looked around uncertainly at the never-ending white fog. “How are we going to get out of here?” 

Jon gave him a soft smile, the kind that was reserved for Martin only, and it felt like warmth washed over Martin’s entire body. “Don’t worry, I know the way.” Then he gently tugged Martin along. 

They walked for an unknown amount of time before suddenly they were standing in the tunnels under the Institute, and Jon gave Martin that grin again before pulling him along. When they emerged in the archives, Basira was waiting, gun in hand. She lowered it when she saw that it was the two of them. “I honestly wasn’t sure whether I’d see you again,” she admitted. “We should probably get you two out of here. Someone called the police and you’re covered in blood.”

Jon looked down with an almost comical look of surprise, and then pulled a face at the sight of the blood. It was his favorite sweater (that he’d stolen from Martin years ago and was clearly too big for him even after going through the dryer so many times). “Yeah. Might be good to lay low for a bit. How’s Daisy?”

Basira sighed. “She embraced the Hunt to get rid of those two idiots, but I think- I think that she’s going to be alright. She’s sleeping now, but she’s not too badly injured. Strange, I once begged her to embrace it, and now that she has, I feel terribly guilty.” Then she let out a slightly uncomfortable laugh. “Anyways, time for you two to go. I’ll text you with instructions on how to get to one of Daisy’s safe houses. And don’t forget to grab a few statements to tide you over.”

There was a moment of awkward silence, and then Jon and Basira shared a brief and awkward hug, both looking oddly pleased when they pulled away. Jon took Martin’s hand again, like he couldn’t stand to not be touching Martin for longer than a few seconds, and the two of them made their way out of the Institute. 

Once they were in Martin’s car and on their way to the location Basira sent them, Martin cleared his throat. “Should I even ask about the blood? Or about who exactly Daisy had to fight?”

Jon sighed tiredly, and then reached over to lightly touch the back of Martin’s hand before dropping his arm back down again. “The blood is Peter’s. I wanted answers, but he resisted, and I guess I just pushed too hard. I’m not sorry about it, though. Not when he trapped you in the Lonely and I still don’t even really understand why. Daisy had to fight Trevor and Julia- the monster hunters? They were apparently quite angry when I freed Gerry.” There was a brief moment of silence, and then Jon scooted over to lean his head against Martin’s shoulder. “I’m glad that you’re here.”

They were out of the city, so Martin decided that he could drive well enough with one hand, and wrapped his arm around Jon’s shoulders. “Me too.”  
,,,

Martin decided to head out for a walk while Jon read a statement. He loved the sound of Jon’s voice, but even though he knew that Jon was still human (mostly), it could be almost scary to hear the way Jon sort of fell into the statements until he sounded as though he were recounting something that had actually happened to him. “Of course I’ll tell you if I see any good cows,” he said before pressing a light kiss to the top of Jon’s head.

He wandered around for about half an hour before deciding that that was probably enough time, and turned back. Daisy’s safehouse was surprisingly quaint, and not the militaristic base that they had both expected. It was nice, because it made it easy to pretend that they were just on a bit of a vacation. Though why anyone would want to vacation in Scotland was beyond him, but still. 

When he opened the front door and didn’t hear anything, he assumed that it meant Jon was done, and he went into the bedroom to greet his boyfriend. He paused when he saw the way that Jon was sitting so stiffly, eyes squeezed shut as he held a piece of paper tightly enough to crumple it. The top of the paper wavered as Jon’s hands shook. “Jon, what-”

John spoke through clenched teeth. “Martin, whatever happens, you cannot let me read this statement.” It sounded as though it was straining him just to get out a few sentences. “Martin, you need to-”

Martin pulled the paper out of Jon’s hands, though Jon couldn’t let go, and it ended up tearing so Jon was still holding two scraps. A quick scan of the words was enough to tell Martin exactly why he couldn’t let Jon speak any of it. Martin looked around the room in a hurry, and then snatched up the spider lighter that was sitting on top of the dresser, and he lit the paper before tossing it into the fireplace. 

When it was nothing but ashes, he looked desperately over at the bed again, but Jon still seemed like he was fighting himself to stay still and keep his eyes shut. “That wasn’t enough. Not when I- ugh- when I know.” He let out a pained noise. “Martin, there can’t be an Archivist. It’s too dangerous, and he’s just going to keep trying, and if I’m gone and he picks a new one, it should be easier to-”

Martin shook his head. “I can’t kill you!”

There was a brief pause, and then Jon almost managed a smile despite the situation. “No, no, I would never… I just meant that it’s time for me to quit.”

He put extra emphasis on the last word so that Martin knew what he was talking about, and Martin winced. He couldn’t think of any painless way to blind Jon, at least not with such a time crunch, but if this was the only way, then he’d do it. So he kissed the top of Jon’s head, and then ran to the kitchen to grab a spoon. He felt like vomiting just at the idea of what he was going to do, but he knew that he couldn’t do anything that would take longer than a few seconds on each eye.

Martin grabbed several towels and a big glass of water, then ran back to the room. He grabbed the lighter again, then took a deep breath and knelt on the bed next to Jon. “I don’t- this is going to hurt. And we don’t even know- what if being the Archivist is the only thing keeping you alive?”

Jon’s voice came out oddly gentle despite how much he was clearly struggling. “I was told that it isn’t heroic to jump on a grenade that you’ve thrown, but in this case, it’s one I’ve got to jump on. It’s the entire world, Martin, and I get the feeling that this ritual won’t fail like the others did. I know it’s unfair to ask this of you, but please, do this.”

Martin wanted to scoff at the idea that somehow this situation was unfair to Martin of all people, but instead he just nodded, even though Jon wouldn’t be able to see it. He thought about giving a three second warning, but then figured that it might be better if it was a surprise.

He shoved up one of Jon’s eyelids and used the spoon to scoop it up, doing his best to ignore the loud shouts of pain that Jon let out. Jon managed to keep his other eye shut the whole time, though. It felt like it took hours, even though it was really only a couple of seconds. Then Martin did the same to the other eye.

Martin was absolutely not an expert on the various tissues and nerves in the eye sockets, but he couldn’t just leave Jon to bleed freely, so he used the lighter to cauterize the injuries, and then he ran to grab some pain medication, and some sleeping pills (both of them had been plagued by nightmares for quite a while now). He got Jon to drink a glass of water and take the pills, and then tucked him into bed.

Then it was time for the grossest part. Martin wasn’t sure if just pulling the eyes out would be enough, so he used the towels to scoop them both up, went outside, balled up the towel, and then put it on the floor so that he could stomp down on it over and over again until there was no chance that the eyes could ever be salvaged. Then he lit a small fire in the backyard to burn the towel as much as he possibly could.

Once that was taken care of, Martin went back inside. Jon was whimpering softly, and the pills hadn’t had enough time to work yet. “I’m sorry,” Martin whispered over and over as he carefully picked up Jon and carried him out to the car. He hated hospitals after Jon’s coma, but he didn’t know what else to do. 

Apparently Basira had been able to get into Elias’ accounts and take quite a lot of money, and she had sent a lot of it to Jon and Martin. And with enough money in hand, Martin was able to buy his way out of any difficult questions. He stayed by Jon’s side as often as he could during his two week stay in the hospital. 

Jon was fitted with two prosthetic eyes, and Martin had made sure that the color matched as closely as possible to the original color. Once it was all done, not many people would be able to guess that they weren’t real, until they noticed that the eyes didn’t move and shift around like real ones did. 

But neither Jon nor Martin cared, because they were both alive, and as safe as they could be, and they were together, which was of course the most important part.


End file.
